Painting as Corvis White
"The Birds Eye"- click to read
I was crippled.
Crippled, by an overwhelming inner critic. An excoriating voice that strangled the joy out of painting. It was a bad case of artistic block. It took me over twenty years to come to terms with it. After a time, when asked, I would say that I had given up on painting. Anything to help me move away from that voice. That mean spirit.
It didn't work.
It didn't work because creativity is persistent. It sneaks into the darkest areas. Insists on light. It shows up where you don't expect it. My art career had crashed in a heap, but the yearning for the creative process remained. Even though I had taken on another identity in my life, the creative flame remained lit; guttering, low, but still THERE.
As the years went by, a pledge arose within me- unbidden -from the rubble. It went like this: “If I can get back to painting with love, then the latter part of my life will be a success”. I recalled the passion of a 16-year-old boy discovering his love of nature, and of finding a way to interpret that love, for others to enjoy. I wanted that again.
Navigating a route through this long-lived artistic block, I finally found a way back. A way to spread out and play; and to be kind to myself. Enter my playful alter ego/totem spirit, the white raven. His name is Corvis White. These are his paintings, created using my digitally manipulated photography as a basis to create custom paint by numbers (PBN).
Using PBN as a scaffolding I have now found a way back to pushing paint, and loving it. And NO I don't stay within the lines (what fun is that?) I use blending, scumbling and glazing, just as in regular painting. The result is a hybrid.
The big difference between this and my older work is that I walk away happy. I love seeing my vision as a photographer spark to life on canvas! These paintings please me. Bring me joy.
Crippled, by an overwhelming inner critic. An excoriating voice that strangled the joy out of painting. It was a bad case of artistic block. It took me over twenty years to come to terms with it. After a time, when asked, I would say that I had given up on painting. Anything to help me move away from that voice. That mean spirit.
It didn't work.
It didn't work because creativity is persistent. It sneaks into the darkest areas. Insists on light. It shows up where you don't expect it. My art career had crashed in a heap, but the yearning for the creative process remained. Even though I had taken on another identity in my life, the creative flame remained lit; guttering, low, but still THERE.
As the years went by, a pledge arose within me- unbidden -from the rubble. It went like this: “If I can get back to painting with love, then the latter part of my life will be a success”. I recalled the passion of a 16-year-old boy discovering his love of nature, and of finding a way to interpret that love, for others to enjoy. I wanted that again.
Navigating a route through this long-lived artistic block, I finally found a way back. A way to spread out and play; and to be kind to myself. Enter my playful alter ego/totem spirit, the white raven. His name is Corvis White. These are his paintings, created using my digitally manipulated photography as a basis to create custom paint by numbers (PBN).
Using PBN as a scaffolding I have now found a way back to pushing paint, and loving it. And NO I don't stay within the lines (what fun is that?) I use blending, scumbling and glazing, just as in regular painting. The result is a hybrid.
The big difference between this and my older work is that I walk away happy. I love seeing my vision as a photographer spark to life on canvas! These paintings please me. Bring me joy.
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I hope they do the same for you!
Corvis White September 2023 |
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